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とりあえず「とりあえず」やめてみない? Is That Decision Real?

I heard M talking on the phone and she used an interesting word in Japanese, called toriaezu (toh-ree-ai-zoo).

She said to her editor, “Toriaezu I’ll send you an outline. We can polish it together when I see you”. She was referring to some article she was writing.

The word “toriaezu” caught my attention.

Apparently, itmeans “tentatively”. I’m guessing it means something like, “for now”.

For example, Japanese people would say at a bar, “Toriaezu, I’ll have a beer”.

For starters they’ll go with beer, and later on they’ll proceed to the drinks they love, such as sake or whiskey.

Or, when young collage graduates are looking for a job, they would land a job in a field they are not that excited about. They say, “Toriaezu, I’ll do this job for three years. Then I’ll figure out what I really want to do”. They don’t have much passion for it, but it’s a stable job, and it makes their parents happy.

Toriaezu – what a convenient word. It leaves your real decisions in the hands of your future self.

For now, you get to make a lazy decision. You can put your real desires and passion aside, and think about them later.

But I wonder.

Does that time to make that real decision ever arrive? Is today an extension of that tentative decision you didn’t give much thought to? Or is today based on a choice your heart has made carefully?

Humans believe, that they will have enough time to make their real decision someday. They will quiet down their passion and do things they don’t really enjoy doing. I don’t get it.

They say, “I can still have fun on the weekends”. Or “I can do what I love when I retire”.

But no one knows, if you’ll have time for that later.

I wouldn’t know how to use the word toriaezu. Cats don’t have that word, because we are made to not imagine the future.

Every decision I make is a real decision. I listen to what my instinct is saying. I listen to it carefully.

Do I want to take a nap now? Or eat?

Do I want to nag M to put down the damn rectangular thing she’s always staring at and play with me?

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